The 23 Clock vs. Foster The People (Or, Why Success Is A Stupid Idea)

So here it is.

I’m a week away from my 23rd birthday. My “golden birthday,” no less. So really this is my last chance to over-celebrate a birthday before I start calling them “the big something-0.”

Since the average good-citizen person graduates college at 22, I haven’t felt much pressure to have my life together up to this point. Sure, I felt the You Are Smart and the You Are Talented and the You Are Racking Up Lots of Student Debt, but those were more incentives to overachieve. I had high school English teacher’s pet IN THE BAG, so why should the rest of my life be any different?

I know when you reach a certain point in life they can say about you that “the clock is ticking.” What is this clock? When does it start ticking? Does Father Time take bribes?

I think for me personally the clock is going to start ticking in six-and-a-half days when I no longer have matching double-digits. Twenty-three just SOUNDS older. Twenty-two is “aww, you have so much potential!” and twenty-three is “so…what are you doing?”

In a week I’ll suddenly have to think about my eggs drying up and my hair falling out and whether I’ll have a real “career” and whether anyone will EVER REALLY LOVE ME. For now it’s okay for me to go to Coachella and have Netflix marathons and be eating microwave garlic shrimp spring rolls at 1am. But then I need to get serious.

After this week, I won’t be getting any younger.

I’ve spent so much time trying to figure out what I should focus on in life to be most successful. Trying to find the “niche” that I can fill and devote all my time, energy and self-promotion to–since I’m not a classically trained musician or anything straightforward like that. Most of the reason I haven’t written in this blog more is because I’m embarrassed that it doesn’t have a single agenda, like cooking or something. It’s like I don’t have a goal. How very cute and 22-ish of me.

Really though, the world isn’t going to care much what I “do with my life.” Not any more than they remember my Facebook statuses for more than two minutes. Which is sad to realize for a few seconds, and then completely freeing and awesome.

So, with this year, I think I’m going to focus on having good community with people. Which means things like making rent and making lunch and making time. Things that I will have to keep working at for years and years. Which is handy, because years and years are exactly what I’ve (probably) got. But really, if I can do what I need to do to foster good relationships all around, how could I possibly not be a successful person?

Happy Birthday to little old me.


About han-nah

I'm a little bit more every day.

Posted on June 17, 2012, in Adulthood, Story of My Life. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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